Andy Munro’s continued attempt to get his hair cut in silence.
On my second visit to the barbers since the easing of the lockdown, and after seeing my grandson with a sharp Peaky Blinder cut, I decided to visit the scene of the crime, the Turkish VIP Barbers somewhat incongruously located next to the Maypole Chippie.
Pleasingly, I was only one of two socially distanced customers with the staff wearing masks as they went about their 
business. As it was a Tuesday, I was entitled to the pensioner’s rate but although I like to think that I don’t look all of my 69 years, there’s no mistaking that I’m an old geezer!
Yet, the opening welcome was cunningly around “How is my job going?” (to which I replied that I now did mainly volunteering) and a delightful observation that I didn’t have much grey hair. All of this was no doubt aimed at unnerving me and disenfranchising my claims to the £6-50p OAP rate.
In desperation to increase the outlay, I was even asked whether I wanted an eyebrow trim. Blimey, did he think I was Dennis Healey? Or perhaps Groucho Marx? Anyway, I stuck to my guns and paid up the £6.50 due but with a £1-50p tip to cheer up the young Turk.
Incidentally, it was a more than decent cut, with the barber using a wide range of clippers and trimmers which would even have had Sweeney Todd, salivating and this was all topped off with a spray of Turkey’s exclusive Pomade. I will be definitely returning, not least because I was spared the attentions of the usual British barber’s shop philosophy.
