Cutting it (Part II)

Andy Munro’s continued attempt to get his hair cut in silence.

On my second visit to the barbers since the easing of the lockdown, and after seeing my grandson with a sharp Peaky Blinder cut, I decided to visit the scene of the crime, the Turkish VIP Barbers somewhat incongruously located next to the Maypole Chippie.

Pleasingly, I was only one of two socially distanced customers with the staff wearing masks as they went about their business. As it was a Tuesday, I was entitled to the pensioner’s rate but although I like to think that I don’t look all of my 69 years, there’s no mistaking that I’m an old geezer!

Yet, the opening welcome was cunningly around “How is my job going?” (to which I replied that I now did mainly volunteering) and a delightful observation that I didn’t have much grey hair. All of this was no doubt aimed at unnerving me and disenfranchising my claims to the £6-50p OAP rate.

In desperation to increase the outlay, I was even asked whether I wanted an eyebrow trim. Blimey, did he think I was Dennis Healey? Or perhaps Groucho Marx? Anyway, I stuck to my guns and paid up the £6.50 due but with a £1-50p tip to cheer up the young Turk.

Incidentally, it was a more than decent cut, with the barber using a wide range of clippers and trimmers which would even have had Sweeney Todd, salivating and this was all topped off with a spray of Turkey’s exclusive Pomade. I will be definitely returning, not least because I was spared the attentions of the usual British barber’s shop philosophy.