The US prez invites our roving reporter Sir Howard Elston to a secret sitdown in his White House bunker.
Donald Trump): Infamy, infamy….(dramatic pause)…
DT: They all got it in for me..enemies all around. Traitors behind every barbed wire golf cart
SHE: You say there’s a huge postal fraud conspiracy in the..
DT: Ever since I was twelve and squashing frogs in my blue collar gated community, I’ve known there’s been plots…BIG PLOTS..to do me in. To keep me from victory, victory, victory…But I’ll show them, I’ll show them
SHE: So, once the ballot fraud is uncovered, what happens?
DT: I will pardon myself for crimes I never committed…
DT: Run for president in 2024 with Ivanka as my Duchess and my two idiot sons as High Commissioner and Grand Vizier. Then, with powers unending I shall unleash the vultures of hell and….
(sound of creaking door, small arms fire, a frightened whimper, sound of handcuffs. Then silence…)