Personal tragedy leads Midland businesswoman to press for law change.
In 2007, Rebecca Mander was sales director of a successful Midlands manufacturing company and happily married with two children.
Overnight her life fell apart when her baby son, Charlie, died from pneumococcal septicaemia, a deadly strain of pneumonia.
Returning to work three days – or even seven days – later would have been unthinkable for Rebecca, who lives in Stratford-upon-Avon.
But, until now, there has been no automatic right for bereaved parents to have more than five days’ leave.
Thanks to a national campaign, spearheaded by bereaved mum Lucy Herd whose two-year-old son Jack drowned ten years ago, a new law is being introduced this month giving all employed parents who lose a child a minimum of two weeks’ leave.
The Parental Bereavement (Leave and Pay) Act – also known as Jack’s Law – has been welcomed by Rebecca as a milestone moment, which she hopes will foster a new level of thought and compassion in the workplace.
But she believes there is still more that employers can do. She says: “Jack’s Law is a great step forward and thanks to Lucy’s campaign parents will be better protected in the future.
“But these measures are a minimum, and I believe organisations must offer additional support through their coaching programmes, associated charities or mentor systems when the bereaved parent returns to work.”
It took Rebecca many weeks before she returned to work full time. She eventually became MD of the business and built up a multi-million-pound turnover, before stepping down in 2014 for a change of direction.n Now, 13 years since Charlie died, and with the help of a psychologist, love and support from family and friends, and having another child – 12-year-old Ruby – Rebecca has learnt to live with grief and says returning to work was an important part of her recovery.
“If I’d put my life on hold for ever, I’d have been a victim and I did not want this to define me,” she said.
Though the support Rebecca received helped her get to where she is today, she recognises that not everyone is as lucky.
“Without support, statistics show that bereaved parents are far more likely to leave employment, that relationships suffer, and recovery takes longer, affecting families and organisations long term,” she explained.
Motivated by her experience, Rebecca is now a business coach and founder of guruyoucoach.com specialising in helping senior leaders like herself through personal setbacks, including bereavement.
She is a Fellow of the Institute of Leadership & Management and is currently working with NatWest on their award-winning Entrepreneur Accelerator Programme.
Looking back, Rebecca believes her loss made her a better leader – wiser, more resilient and more empathetic. “I clearly remember, as MD, going to a meeting where we were about to lose a customer that was 50 per cent of our business. My sales director was with me and he was absolutely petrified. I said to him, when you get home and your wife’s OK and your girls are OK, that’s all that matters. We can get through anything else.”
“Now, as a leader and coach, when I tell people that it does get better, they believe me, because there is no worse loss than the loss of a child,” she said.
As a qualified executive coach, Rebecca is a much sought-after keynote speaker and is supported by a carefully selected team.
During the current Covid-19 restrictions, coaching courses are being arranged via Zoom for those working from home.