The Birmingham Press

Howard: The big interview with IDS

Sir Howard Elston asks the big questions to Iain Duncan Smith, who has shocked the nation by quitting the Cabinet.

 

Top baldy politician Iain Duncan Smith (aka IDS)  ran The Dept of Work and PensIons for six years before throwing a major strop and flouncing out of the U.K. Government cabinet.

For those not wallowing in the excrement of British politics, Smith, whose features resemble a human marshmallow, wants out of Europe, ran a lousy department plagued with sloppy management, was a joke as a Tory leader, and strove to cut benefits to the sick, the old and the disabled.This morning Sir Howard, our political editor, gave the millionaire political muppet an audience.

SIR ELSTON HOWARD: Well, well, well, it’s Dunko, the out of work minister. Sounds like the Treasury wanted to cut back your welfare plans. But your plans included cutting back on benefits to the disabled among others.

IAIN DUNCAN SMITH: Well, I am a a bit of a shit, aren’t I?

SHE: And your department did hire debt collectors to retrieve overpaid benefits to the poor.

IDS: Well, I am a bit of a shit, aren’t I?

SHE: And you kind of played fast and loose about a semi -fictional educational background that was found out to be a bit of a fantasy.

Dunko

IDS: Well, I am a bit of a….

SHE: And your leaving the cabinet is all about knifing the Chancellor of the Exchequer in the back because you hate him and he called you thick…

IDS: Well I am a bit of a shit, aren’t I?

SHE: And as a salivating anti-EU loony, you also wanted to do the dirty on pro-EU Prime Minister Dave Cameron just before the EU referendum…

IDS: Well, I am a bit of a …..

SHE: Shit. Dunko, great to see you. Now, quietly piss off and disappear onto the rubbish heap of history.

 

Additional reportage by our Euro correspondent Senor Antoine de Patrique.

 

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