by Our Man in the Know Howard Elston
Commercial station ITV today launches its new look Philosophy X Factor today with Simon Cowell and Cheryl Cole among the judges to find out who is the top brainbox in Britain.
Going head-to-head in the first of the Saturday evening shows will be John Locke versus Thomas Hobbes who will both try to grab judges’ votes from the British public on the subject: ‘What is the Natural State of Man?’
Both thinkers will kick off with a five minute burst of insight into this mind boggling topic. Tom, as we all know, thinks Man will revert to anarchy because He leads a short brutish life.
But Jono is bit more of an altruist and quips that Man, as a social animal,will tend towards forming a society.
‘It’s a head to head bust up’ says Simon, the top talent czar. ‘They see mankind from opposite views.’
And Cheryl adds: ‘My Liberal leanings go towards Jono. But Hobbesy is a hard nut to crack.’
Cameras have been following both contestants flexing their cerebral muscles as they prepare for their head to head clash.
Judges have been allocated contestants to coach. They are giving top tips on singing, dancing, epistemology and moral ethics.
Other top smarties lined up the worldwide contest next spring are Jean Paul ‘Fancy That’ Sartre, Plato The Greek, ‘Smelly’ Machiavelli and Peter Andre.
John Locke said today at a press launch: ‘Hobbesy and me are fundamentally the same. I give him credit for setting me up with my ideas of personal liberty.’
And Tom Hobbes, cast as The Evil One by tv fans, quipped: ‘We need strong absolutist leadership for protection. But I ain’t no Nazi.’
Both Simon and Cheryl added in unison: ’Moral and political philosophy are made for tv. And the audiences will love it too. You’ll love the mental devilry and the out and out madcap competitive streak running through the 12 week show.’
For Mr Cowell especially, this match up will have extra meaning as he himself wrestled with The Pure Theory of Domestic Values throughout most of his early years. It is one reason why he is close, still, to Sharon Osborn.
The show’s producers also poured cold water on weekend tabloid stories that said Jono had a love child by an unnamed Hollywood starlet. ITV said it had strict codes of behaviour and wouldn’t have let John Locke participate if he had a child outside of wedlock.
