Sir Howard Elston (DOA) replies to the urgent queries of the day despite being shackled by his electronic ankle tag .

Q: Do the recent ice wind storms augur radical climate change in our environment and the very world around us…or what? From C. McIlvannie, Glasgow

A: No, you dummy. It’s winter and it happens every year so pipe down and wear a hat and gloves

Sir Howard replies to all private queries on @sirhowardelston